How to Make Someone Feel Heard (Even When You Say No) - Julia MinsonUncomfy: Sticking with Moments That Challenge Us • Season 2026, Episode 11
Mar 17, 2026 • 23m
What if the goal of disagreement isn’t to win but to build a bridge to the next conversation?
Harvard Kennedy School professor Julia Minson studies one thing: how to disagree better. In this episode of Uncomfy, she shares why most of us confuse disagreement with conflict and how that mistake quietly damages our closest relationships.
From ballroom dancing arguments with her husband to a life-and-death disagreement with her mother’s oncologist, Julia explains the powerful difference between being receptive and being persuaded.
“You don’t have to give in to make someone feel profoundly heard.”
ABOUT GUEST
Julia Minson is a professor of public policy at the Harvard Kennedy School of Government and author of the new book, “How to Disagree Better” (https://www.juliaminson.com/)
CHAPTERS
(0:00) Introduction
(0:56) Meet Julia Minson
(1:30) Kitchen Dance Disagreement
(4:12) Disagreement vs Conflict
(6:07) Studying Disagreement
(7:18) Receptive Not Persuaded
(8:43) Mom’s Doctor Story
(13:01) Listen With Your Mouth
(15:08) HEAR Framework Breakdown
(19:12) Authenticity and Practice
(21:03) Conclusion