Mistakes Were Made (But Not By Me)

Kim Power Stilson fills in for a vacationing Matt Townsend as we explore the bad choices we make and what to do when we need some clarity. Self Justification (22:57) An honest look into how to fix our bad habit of self justification with Dr. Carol Tavris, co-author of the book "Mistakes Were Made (But Not By Me)." She describes the psychological phenomenom called cognitive dissonance, where a belief and behavior conflict with each other inside out heads. Tavris says eventually one of the two has to yield. She describes the kind of dissonance that we can't live with most is when information conflicts with something central to the definition of ourselves. For instance, we may consider ourselves a "good friend to all," and reject new information that indicates we are treating one of our friends poorly. We reduce the discomfort by dismissing the new conflicting information.  The reason we feel such discomfort, she says, is because our entire identity is brought into question. "Remember, what we're protecting here is a view of myself as a smart, well-informed, ethical person. I come up with this belief that 'X is Y.'" Tavris says. "Now if you tell me I'm wrong, it's not just my belief you're questioning, it's my view of myself as an intelligent person who makes wise decisions."  She says science is humanity's one and only "humility control" because it forces a person to test their beliefs, as it tests of confirming evidence and dis-confirming evidence.